“I do declare, this is a dumpster fire”…
Last week we said adios to Alexis Mateo and concluded the very confusing Alexis vs. India vs. Shea debacle. There are four queens remaining, and as promised last week, we are getting a comedy challenge. Will more drama arise eventually? Probably. We’re so close to finding out who the next all-star will be. Let’s get into it.
As always, we meet up with our queens back in the werk room following Alexis’s elimination. Blair is feeling all sorts of emotion. Jujubee praises Alexis for her run, and the queens congratulate Cracker on her second challenge win. Cracker is happy that she didn’t win the lip sync, stating that she didn’t want that decision to fall on her shoulders. When Jujubee asks her what her decision was, Cracker plays around with the girls before revealing that she also chose Alexis’s lipstick. Blair is thankful for another chance in the competition. The queens open the ballot box to reveal that all of the remaining queens chose Alexis to go home. Shea feels a bit of relief that Alexis is gone, but still confused about the drama that was left behind. This is the top four, and with four fierce queens left it’s anybody’s game.
The next day in the werk room the top four enter and read Alexis’s lipstick message. After reading the brief message, the queens gather around the table and agree that the judges are really splitting hairs at this point. Ru makes an entrance into the werk room, and it’s clear this week’s challenge is a comedy smackdown. Each of the queens will have to come up with a routine that is packed with jokes from beginning to end. They will get to workshop their jokes with Ross, and a mystery funny gal before performing in front of a life audience. Because Miz Cracker was the top All Star last week, she gets to choose the order of the performances. This challenge determines who moves onto the finale, so you know… no pressure. The queens get to work writing their jokes, and Shea is feeling like she’s not the funniest queen in the room. Blair knows she’s not a comedy queen, but she feels like she can pull it out for the challenge. Miz Cracker reveals that she’s challenging her sisters with the order. Jujubee is opening the show, followed by Blair, Cracker, and finally Shea closing the show. Cracker isn’t hiding her motive. She tells the other girls the order is strictly strategic. We’ll just have to wait and see if it all plays out like she had hoped for.
It’s time for the queens to workshop their material out on the mainstage with Ross, and the Rural Juror herself, the legendary Jane Krakowski! Juju is up first, and her jokes aren’t landing in the way she hoped they were. While she has the foundations for a great routine, it needs some work. Blair is up next, and for somebody who was worried about not being funny, she might actually win this challenge. Miz Cracker’s jokes are too wordy. Both Ross and Jane want her to be present and funny in her comedy set. Finally, Shea stumbles through her jokes, and they’re getting a few laughs, but they all agree she can go harder, and use her past experiences to drive her routine. It will be interesting to see how this all plays out when it comes down to the challenge.
It’s elimination day, and the queens are getting ready for their stand-up debut. Shea is feeling…nervous, gassy, and planning on looking drop dead gorgeous to deflect from her lack of funny. Blair tells the girls about how much Jane and Ross loved her material, and Jujubee tells Cracker that she’s thankful for the opening spot. The queens discuss their opinions on Cracker’s choices for the lineup. While some are grateful, others are feeling underestimated, or straight-up scared. There’s nothing wrong with some healthy competition though, right? Out on the main stage Ru welcomes this week’s guest judges Jane Krakowski, and Sam Richardson, and it’s time for the comedy smackdown. Jujubee opens the show. Her jokes are off to a rocky start, but she eventually finds her footing. Blair is out next, and it seems like her material in the workshop was written on different pages that she forgot back at the hotel. Yikes. Cracker is out next, and her material is good. The best so far, and everybody is laughing start to finish. Shea is up to close the show. She not only looks absolutely stunning, but she’s also killing her set.
Following the comedy challenge the queens take to the runway, and the category is Freak Out! All the queens walk the runway in their most colourful, freaky lewks. When it comes to the critiques, the judges love Jujubee’s look, but felt her stand-up started off rocky, but she caught her stride. They loved Blair’s runway, but read her for reading her notes too much during her set. The judges were so pleased that Cracker finally let go during her set, and delivered great comedy, and while her runway took a different turn than all of the other looks, she still knocked it out of the park. Last, the judges agree that while her runway look is fun, it’s not the freakiest that she could have done. However, her comedy set was it honey! Following critiques, Ru announces that Miz Cracker is once again, the top all-star of the week. The remaining three queens are all in the bottom. Backstage the queens congratulate Cracker on her win. Blair admits she choked during her set and gets to campaigning for a spot in the top three. Shea believes that it’s Blair’s time to go, and she’s hoping all of the other queens are on the same page.
The bottom three plead their cases, and it’s clear all of them still want a spot in the final. After some casual product placement for Poo Pourri, the queens cast their votes, and Cracker picks her lipstick. Out on the main stage, this week’s lip sync assassin is revealed as Kennedy Davenport. Cracker and Kennedy lip sync to Reba McEntire’s Fancy. After a wordy, and passionate lip sync, Ru decides that Miz Cracker is the winner of the lip sync, as well as the decision to send one of the top four home. Cracker reveals that the queen not moving onto the finale, and going home is Blair St.Clair. We’re proud of how far she’s come, and she definitely has a lot to be proud of. Next week is the grand finale, and before the music plays, Ru gets a phone call, but she obviously doesn’t reveal the message. What could it mean?
What we’ll see next week: It’s the finale, the eliminated queens make their return, and so does some drama. The top three collaborate on a new Ru song, and a winner is crowned!
Missed a week?: Read our RuPaul’s Drag Race All Star 5 weekly recaps right here!
POST A COMMENT