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Charlie Carver’s Coming Out Note Will Inspire You

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Charlie Carver has been making headlines ever since he came out as gay with a touching message that’s inspiring the LGBT community and fans around the globe.

The actor— one half of the Carver twins who you may recognize from Teen Wolf, The Leftovers, or as Felicity Huffman’s twin boys on Desperate Housewives— penned a heartfelt essay that was split in a series of five Instagram posts, each accompanied by a photo of the anonymous quote, “Be Who You Needed When You Were Younger.”

In the essay Carver explained that it took him years to come to terms with his sexuality saying, “As a young boy, I knew I wanted to be an actor. I knew I wanted to be a lot of things… It was around that age that I also knew, however abstractly, that I was different from some of the other boys in my grade. Over time, this abstract ‘knowing’ grew and articulated itself through a painful gestation marked by feelings of despair and alienation, ending in a climax of saying three words out loud: ‘I am gay.'”

Carver then describes the experience of coming out to his family and acknowledges his privilege in being immediately accepted.

“If you’re ready and feel safe, then think about sharing this part of yourself with others,” the 27-year-old wrote. “I recognize that I was born with an immense amount of privilege, growing up in a family where my orientation was celebrated and SAFE. If you feel like you want to Come Out, make sure first and foremost that you have a support system and will be safe. I would never encourage anyone to Come Out only to find themselves in harm’s way — a disproportionate number of homeless American (and global) youth are members of the LGBTQ community who were kicked out of their families and homes out of hate and prejudice.”

Carver has portrayed several gay characters on screen. He played Ethan on MTV’s hit show Teen Wolf and appears in a few steamy scenes with James Franco and Zachary Quinto in I Am Michael, but he had dodged commenting his own sexuality until now.

It’s a big deal. While coming out may be deemed less necessary these days it’s still important, especially for celebrities and high profile people in public space to come out and help remove any remaining stigma or fear.

Carver clearly understands that and closed his Instagram coming out story by getting to the meaning of the quote that accompanied his posts: “But what can I do? How can I participate? Honesty is probably a great step in the right direction. I now believe that by omitting this part of myself from the record, I am complicit in perpetuating the suffering, fear, and shame cast upon so many in the world. In my silence, I’ve helped decide for you too that to be gay is to be, as a young man (or young woman, young anyone), inappropriate for a professional career in the Arts (WHAAA???) So now, let the record show this- I self-identify as gay. And does that really matter anymore? As a young man in Hollywood to say that — and without being a d-ck about it, I owe it to myself, more than anything, to be who I needed when I was younger.”

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