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I’m a bi guy in my thirties who has been with my partner for almost five years. Sure it can sometimes be hard to not get to be with women, but I am mostly very content just being with my man. What does bother me, though, is that I feel like the bi part of me is in the shadows and not really recognized by my friends and boyfriend. When I’ve passively acknowledged my bisexuality in the past, my partner makes little jokes or playfully flirts with his “real man.” Similarly, our mostly middle-aged gay friends make occasional jabs at my sexuality. I don’t think they mean any harm, but I’d rather they all understand that this is a very real part of me. This can all make me feel lonely and small. How does a bi guy exist in a same-gender relationship without effacing his bi-ness?

Dennis